I'm having eye trouble. I must be. Or maybe, it's visual processing issues.... Maybe I should call the doctor..an opthamologist maybe? Maybe I should try Lasik... but, I'm not sure any medical intervention can help. The problem seems to be more systemic than just a visual one.
See the beautiful purple sock in progress? The intricate twisting of the stitches? The socks are the "Oak Leaf Socks" from the online magazine "knotions". It's a beautiful pattern. It's a beautiful yarn. (Lorna's Laces Shepherd Sock in Blackberry) .. I should love them... but I can't seem to see them as others do.
When I look at them.. I mainly see the mistakes. It's almost like they have been highlighted, or circled in red ink. There are probably thousands of stitches already in this sock. and to be honest a very small few in comparison are incorrect. Yet- to me they stand out. BOLD. Instead of seeing the thousands of RIGHT stitches.. I focus on the ten's (maybe) of wrong ones. I nearly ripped them out to start over.
Instead, I put it on my foot, not because I wanted to- but because some wise soul suggested, that before I rip them out, I should put them on and have another look. I was shocked. From that distance, from that angle- I could suddenly see the pattern. IT WAS THERE afterall! Sure, the mis-crossed stitches were still there... but the overall pattern, now caught my eye.
There is something bigger in this pair of socks than a few crossed stitches. There is my ability to choose to gain perspective on my mistakes, and allow my eyes to be refocused. To see the bigger picture. In life- this is not always my first instinct- not towards myself- or towards others. My instinct is to be critical, and allow the few mistakes to distort my view of both myself and others. Sometimes this is wise and necessary.And sometimes, I "rip" a perfectly good person (most often myself) because all I focus on is faults or mis-crossed stitches.
My eyes may have issues.... but it isn't a doctor I think I need... I think it's a change of perspective.... and the only way MY perspective is changed, is through the one who always sees things with truth and grace. I think I'll be asking Him for help.
"Dear Lord, my critical eye is not hidden from you, both it's strengths and it's weakenesses. I ask you to help me gain perspective.. to focus on the right stitches and not the mis crossed ones...both in myself and those around me. I ask for your wisdom and for your grace to permeate my heart and then my world--- I love you lord- amen."
Labels: Blackberry, devotions, journey, knitting, knotions, lorna's laces shepherd sock, reflection, the love of God