My Beagle Has "Issues" What a Shock.
Sami. Sami the Dog.....
She's our dog. We all love her. She sits on my feet- and keeps them warm, she plays with Noah as if her were a BIG puppy (I think He may be...) She goes camping with us---- and misbehaves. It's fun. SHe's also the fattest Beagle in the world. Like almost 40 lbs. And built like a tank. She's awesome. And CRAZY.
The truth is she's quite neurotic.
Aside from the "typical" Beagle personality... sweet- happy, loving and stubborn.... add "nervous spaz" to her list of character traits.
We live in a neighborhood without fences. That's new to me. (And I don't get it) Although--- I guess the view out the back window is kind of nice and "pastoral" (in a site-condo, houses built on top of each other, and we share a "common" drainage area full of cat tails... kind of way...)
Apparently it's new to Sami as well...and, I think it freaks her out. Though, we've had her since she was just 16 weeks old...She still doesn't seem to "get it"....
Anyway- she spends A LOT of time (read- sometimes hours at a time- between bouts of running in and out) standing at the doorwall- barking hysterically at every animal that comes into view. (Her VIEW- WE see nothing, --- it's entirely possible they are invisible, or imaginary... I haven't found a "doggy shrink" to prove this out yet.. (No- I'm not looking for one) (Now- granted- occasionally a skunk will wander thru--- DON'T ASK, or a possum-- or a big fat racoon that loves dog food) But usually- there is nothing foreboding.
Sami gets this crazed look on her pretty doggy face---- and acts as though aliens were attacking--- or wild beasts are glaring into the kitchen- awaiting their opportunity to attack, and kill or mame us all.
Sami is loyal. Sami wants to protect us. (albeit- from NOTHING!) It's a "DOG Thing"
Ummm... maybe not JUST a DOG thing.... Sometimes I think I do the same thing.....
Well, maybe not the EXACT same thing---- I'd be locked up by now if that were true.... but sometimes- in my fierce loyalty... I think I respond to things like they are attacks---- when really they are just fat little raccoons who like to eat dog food.... or wandering skunks.
At this point- I don't always bare my teeth and growl, but I FEEL like it. I notice that it's worse at certain "times"... ummm of the month, and in certain seasons... like if I am struggling with a certain relationship or insecurity... then everything- or everyone- who wanders thru my emotional "yard" may be on the receiving end of my "barking thru the window" ( thru the window- if their LUCKY--- face to face if not!).
I wonder if Sami feels like it's her job to be "defender of those ( ideas, people) she loves"
I do.
Maybe Sami and I need "SUPERHERO" Capes--- or suits with our "SUPER LOYAL Names" on our chests...... I can be Super "My Church is the Best Woman", Or "My friends Do No Wrong Woman" (They don't- they are perfect... well- ok, not PERFECT--- but they are WONDERFUL!) Or I could be....."My ideas about how things SHOULD be done, are RIGHT Woman"
Sami can be "Super Dog to the Rescue---- Saving the Solomon Family Universe from Nothing Dangerous , Dog"
Maybe I'll learn two color knitting- and knit the capes. Probably NOT.
I guess my point is:
I'm feeling challenged to appreciate loyalty, to recognize it as a wonderful trait, both in me- in Sami, and others, and also to learn not to waste my time "barking at nothing" cause well--- everything isn't an attack--- somethings are just randomly walking thru my unfenced yard.
Dear Jesus- I love you- and I ask you for wisdom to know what really is an attack, and what isn't--- please help me to see when I'm just being crazy like Sami, barking at imaginary attackers... and when I really do need to move in a protective way, or when I just need to back off- and let you fight and defend. (What a novel thought, huh? ) sorry- for stepping in when I shouldn't, I Love you- Lord- and thank you for using even Neurotic Sami- to teach me more about myself and you! amen!
