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Friday, January 26, 2007

Surreal Cereal

luckycharms

Cereal. It is a miracle food. It serves nourishment (of some disputed degree) for so many purposes:

Breakfast- with milk- starts the day of children and adults.

In a zip-loc baggie it quells the voracious hunger of the most ravenous children.

Teens eat bowl after bowl, their bodies using it to fuel their pubescent growth spurt (along with ramen noodles and taco-bell the 3 food groups of teens) . (tee hee I said puberty)

Cereal is the meal replacement of choice- for picky preschoolers- everywhere. When served a wonderful meal of grilled tuna and couscous with a roasted vegetable medley....countless children have been rescued from sure starvation... by, yes, CEREAL.

Cereal is a snack, a meal, and once soggy- becomes a handy way to gross out your mother.

Cereal- once soggy- then dried to a crust of incredible strength, cereal can be used as a replacement for tar, mortar, spackle, wood putty and ashphalt. Soggy cereal can also be used to sculpt furniture.

Cereal- as the one shown in the picture- often times serves as a life lesson in scientific practices... a youngster practices for his future career as an archeologist, or forensic scientist. He carefully uses his tools to extricate ONLY the marshmallows- to be inspected and savored like treasure.

It is true- it is surreal--- it is cereal.

Unbelievable- multi-tasker that it is--- what I'd like to know- is simply this:

Why will my dog seek out the tiniest bit of food from the floor and eat it--- UNLESS my four year old spills a box of cereal..... THAT she (the Sami dog) will leave. ONly to find it's way into every nook and cranny of my home... from under the cushions of my couch, to under the throw rug- to the upstairs bathroom floor...... cereal. Cereal! I'm surrounded!

Cereal. CEREAL! It's SURREAL!

That is all- I need to go vacuum. EVERYTHING.

PS--- the "marshmallows" that are in cereal. ARE NOT MARSHMALLOWS. I am not sure what they are--- but they are NOT MARSHMALLOWS. the end.


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