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Thursday, June 22, 2006

Dr. Princess Barbie, Dancer Singing-Writer, Mommy Nun.

The title says it all. Well, it says MOST of it....

Sara- @ posted about God's plan- verses ours...(scroll to the 21st..(but enjoy the scroll- she's got a great heart for God!) ... Sara challenged me think about, when I was a kid. I remembered what I thought my life would be like...I thought for sure my title would be something like this....

Dr. Princess Barbie, Dancer Singing-Writer, Mommy Nun.

It may not make sense. It may not have been possible, some of the "titles" can't even be held by the same person, (the logistics just don't work;mommy/nun don't go together...) But, hey- I was a KID.

If I compare my actual life to my dream life- it could be depressing. But- honestly, it's not. I think it's a matter of perspective.

I remember thinking I wanted to be SMART. I had a hard time in elementary school, I was ADD before ADD existed.... my report cards all said the same thing.... "Tracey needs to pay more attention to her work, and stop talking to her neighbors.....Tracey needs to spend less time daydreaming, and more time working....."

Let's just say- my kids have seen my report cards- and they are NOT intimidated. I spent a lot of time thinking I was dumb. Determined, stubborn child/woman that I am, my only response was- to PROVE them wrong.....So, to me, that meant being a doctor. (I thought Doctor's knew EVERYTHING, until I got pregnant- and then, I found out how many things they just don't understand!)

Am I Doctor? Duh. NO. Yet- to my guys- I am the ER Doc of choice. Handling blood, knocked out teeth, broken fingers, gashes, and bruises. As for smart--- well- report cards aside, I love learning with my guys, I've learned that being smart, is more about learning than Doctorates.

Princess. Yeah- I was up at four in the morning to see Diana become a princess, before my very eyes. Girls are often enamoured with the "princess concept". When I look at my list, now, I realize that one was gonna be a stretch. I was born to a warehouse worker and a highschool grad. Princesses are usually born, ummmm to royalty.Princess?

All these years later, though- there are days when I KNOW I am a Princess. A child of God, The King of the Universe. Yeah- that makes me a princess. Day to day? I only bring my tiara out for special ocassions.....but, well- trust me, I'm the princess/queen of this house. (I'm the only female- I hold the title by default;) There are moments when my Husband, and my boys look at me- and I FEEL like a princess- that's good enough for me.

Barbie? K. Not so much on this one. Barbie is a ridiculous, unattainable goal. But- we all know the goal there, is a physical one. Barbie is a childhood goal of beauty.

I'll NEVER look like Barbie. Yet- to the guys at my house- I am beautiful.... in the words of my Noah... "Mommy, you're so beautiful, I can't take my eyes off you" (In answer to your question- yes- whatever he asked for after that statement- he DID receive;) I may not be beautiful in the eyes of the world... but to my God- and my guys.... I'm Barbie, only better......(I don't tip over from the disproportion! )Barbie?

Dancing Singer, Writer? Well, we dance when we want, to. Yes, ocassionally in public. Singer? At the top of my lungs..... especially in the car! And definitely in worship. Writer? Well, this blog, and one published article may be as close as it gets. But it's here. And so are you- so thanks for reading, and making my dream come true;)P10500511writer?

Mommy? Without a doubt. Three times over- to three phenomenal sons- that has surpassed all my dreams! I'm also, Mom. MOTHER (when they're disgusted with me, or I've embarrassed them) Mommy Dearest when they feel snotty;) Sweety Momma when the little guy wants something... yeah- this one is a day--- home we go.... 057

Nun? Hmmmm well- I wear a lot of black. ( I KNOW nuns don't necessarily wear black.......) Really- I think as a kid- I thought of Nun's as having a special connection to God. I just didn't know that God wanted to have a special connection (relationship) with each of us.

That- by His grace, I have. As can you.

Have all my dreams come true? In a way, yes. The dreams I had- have changed, as have my understanding of them. But one thing is for sure---- God had a plan, all along!

Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future

Ephesians 1:11In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will...

Dear Lord- I know that you have always been with me, I thank you for the dreams you've planted in my heart- both the ones I've already seen come true- and the ones I've yet to dream. I also thank you for a new perspective- that sees your plan as better than mine! I love you Lord- and trust your plan for all my life- amen

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