"Beep..... Beep...BEEP! The National Weather Service has issued a Severe Thunderstorm Warning for the following counties: please take cover"

If you live in Michigan,

this means, it's time to hit the basement, or or the closet or bathroom for your safety. What an awesome warning system we have. Lives are saved, due to the Early Warning System.

I appreciate the heads up. Really, I do.

But- I'm just wondering, with all the technological advances being made, why haven't they come up with a National Hormone Warning Service? Research shows, that when living in close proximity women's cycles "sync". Since pressure systems are detected with radar, maybe it could be used, or some other "bomb sniffing" type device, could be used to detect the hormone shifts of a general locale, and then issue a warning...(especially one that interrupts Oprah and Sports) It could sound something like this:

"BEEP BEEP BEEP The National Hormone Warning Service, has detected a change in women's hormone levels in the following counties: PMS is about to begin....TAKE COVER, save yourselves! Hide the children! BEEP BEEP BEEP"

My family would certainly appreciate it.

See, I have this PROBLEM, called PMS. It's a Dangerous Storm, trust me. Some may even liken it to a tornado, in regards to the damage left in it's wake. Over the years, I've learned to recognize most of my own "storm signs", but an early warning system could help others.

I'm pretty consistent, in the radar tracking of my "approaching storm".

I do things, like in Monday's post on "Cat Puke." I don't normally leave cat puke on the steps, to get angrier and angrier over. Another SURE sign of impending doom, is when I am bent over- yelling into the dishwasher, about how "I am sick of being the ONLY one, to put things away" I get overwhelmed, by a normal days' tasks. The phrase "I can't do everything by MYSELF!" is another gathering storm cloud.

I rarely drop or break things- but- about once a month- I get clumsy. I average one broken coffee cup a month. I stand at Meijers, locked in turmoil, because I am suddenly unable to choose a brand of toilet paper.

I struggle to get off the couch, because I'm tired. I get a HUGE headache. Sounds bother me. And- my nose- which typically smells almost NOTHING, (since a nose-job at 16) suddenly awakens to a world of obnoxious scents. (funny, I don't get sensitive to good smells!)

What I normally "blow off" I start to "BLOW UP" (or considering blowing up- either way;)

While for some, the symptoms can be simply annoying- PMS (or - in my case PMD) is not funny. It makes an otherwise logical and rational woman, crazy. For years, the entire second half of my cycle was one big "storm". I tried dietary changes, I tried supplements, I tried exercise. I pray, I read the Bible. I though about having the demons cast out of me.....(not really- but you know I was pretty crazy and desperate!)

Finally- I went to the doctor.

Hello, Zoloft. Finally, relief. I take a low dose, every day. Zoloft has changed my fortnight's long PMD, into a 1-2 days storm. I still get moody, but- now I can function. Now, I can laugh at the symtoms,(AFTER they pass) and not be defined or ruled by them. It's a trade -off though- the meds have made weight management considerably harder.

So I have to choose- thin and crazy? Or fat and sane? For the benefit of those who have to tolerate me, I choose chunky.;) (though exercise should help with that as well..)

For a longtime, I was embarrassed, by my need for a prescription for "meds". It felt like some moral/spiritual failure. Like I just couldn't GET A GRIP... so I stooped to "drugs". Like maybe I wasn't fully relying on God.

After much prayer- and talking with my Hubby, and my doctor, I've come to a different conclusion. I need glasses, in order to see clearly, and avoid headaches. Basically, my PMS meds, function in the same way.

Not every woman, who struggles with PMS needs medication. Meds don't ALWAYS work. There are side-effects to consider.

I still think a NHWS would be a helpful, possible life saving organization. At least people could TAKE COVER! ;)

Oh--- BTW.........there MUST be a follow up like for the NWS..

BEEP BEEP The National Hormone Warning System has cancelled it's warning for the following counties: ______you may come out of hiding, but bring an offering of chocolate and chips and salsa, just to be sure! BEEP BEEP.... we now return you to your normally scheduled programming!"

If you are struggling with PMS or PMD I suggest a prayerful visit to your doctor.

Chocolate and chips, don't hurt either... (well, not too much!)

My personal PMS PMD verse:

"I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. 17 But in fact it is no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do" (Romans 7:15-19).

Dear Lord- I know you have created women's bodies (and men's) in an amazing and wonderful way, there are so many things that we cannot yet even understand, I pray for those suffering with PMS/ PMD whether directly, or indirectly, that they would find help, first in your love and acceptance, then in your direction and guidance in how to handle their symptoms- I love you Lord- amen!

Tracey's practical tips for PMS

1) "Be careful little mouth what you eat"... excessive salt , sugar and refined flour are "fuel for the fire." (ouch hate that.. the things I crave are not so good!)

2) Sunshine and fresh air (UV rays have a positive effect on lowgrade depression)

3) Exercise (yeah* GROAN*) exercise can help alleviate many symptoms--- you'll hate it- do it anyway)

4) Watch for the "approaching storm" (know your signs and symptoms, I keep a calendar- so I know when the next storm system is on it's way)

5) Plan around it where possible. (I try NOT to schedule big decisions, or aggresive projects rt before my period)

If your symptoms are hindering your LIFE (or the lives of those around you) make a doctors appointment!

Finally- remember that you're human. God's expectation is not perfection, but affection. Love God- then, deal with your hormones, as He leads!